In this world it is easy to get lost in the crowd. But we are all awesome individuals and we all need to have our moment in the spotlight.
I have been to a number of social events lately both for work and for play, and as the typical writer/observer in the room I have been making mental notes of what makes people seem successful (even if they are not). What is that certain je n’ais sais quoia about someone who makes them turn heads? What can we pick up from the people with all the power and the wealth?
Here are my observations:
1. Give a Firm Handshake
I’ve never known anyone who has a weak or sweaty handshake to be somebody that I would afford a second glance. Fake it to make it people. No matter how nervous or out-of-place you might feel always greet someone with a firm, confident handshake and a smile on your face.
2. Make Direct Eye Contact
When someone is talking do not look at your nails or the television behind them. Even worse, don’t look at the top of their head or to the side of their ears. No, you must look them directly in the eye. But not in a “I want to kill you” way. You must look at them in a smiling “everything you say is absolutely fascinating” way. Nod your head when you are agreeing with them. Shake your head “no” when they are talking about something bad or sad. And always remember to keep focused and intent on them. This is a sure way to get people to love you.
3. Dress Like a Million Bucks
Even if you don’t have a million bucks, you can sure act like it. Goodness knows I get most of my stuff from clearance, blow out sales or the thrift store. But no one is going to know that if I spruce it up. At social events you really do not want to be the one looking like something the cat dragged in. Always make sure you know the dress code: is it black tie formal? Is it casual? Don’t be the odd one out showing up in jeans and a t-shirt while everyone else looks like they are going to Prince William’s wedding.And once you have that awesome outfit on, walk around with your head held high in confidence.
4. Laugh at People’s Jokes
I know. Some people just are not funny. Or you might have even heard the joke four times before. But if you want to impress- no matter how much you have to strain it- try to laugh or at least smile. People love to feel validated. And validation always occurs when you laugh at their dumb jokes.
5. Memorize Random Facts
People always love to learn something new. If your brain is like an index of fascinating facts it will only help you become an asset to any conversation. Throw in a fact about something that someone is talking about and not only will they be intrigued but it will bolster the conversation.
6. Be Genuine
Although sometimes it is important to fake the funk, everyone can see through you if all you are is a faker. Being real is so important in how other people perceive you. You might realize that once you let down your wall more and more people are attracted to you. This is because they are finally seeing the true you. There is a delicate balance you must follow though: do not reveal too much of yourself to complete strangers. If people are long time friends or significant others then you can bring more of your guard down. And on the other hand, don’t put up so much of a guard that no one wants to talk to you. Let it down a little bit and let just some of the true you sparkle. Then sit back and watch the reactions you get. You’ll be happy you did let down your guard.
7. Remember People’s Names
I have to admit it! I’m guilty, guilty, guilty. But you can learn a lot from people around you and through Rob I have realized the importance of remembering names. A tip from Rob: When you first meet someone ask them to repeat their name, that way you will remember it. Then, while in conversation, throw their name back at them while talking. They will be so impressed that you remembered their name, and even called them by their name, that they won’t even know how to keep going.
Example: “You see, Mary, that’s exactly how I feel about the economy.”
Then when you see Mary two weeks later at another business function you can say: “Hey Mary! It’s great to see you again.”
Mary is sure to be impressed.
And so that is my list of 7 ways to impress the socks out of everyone you know.
Got some to add? Comment below.
Things that didn’t make the list but should have:
1. Smell nice (and that doesn’t mean an Italian Shower)
2. Don’t compare yourself with others
3. No one loves a wallflower
4. Don’t be a conversation hog
5. Stay classy – dressing like a skank was so 2008
6. Don’t be afraid to talk to strangers
7. Always carry your business card